No Waste Cigars!

Jobu love good cigar. But Jobu against wasting good cigar. Shit, Jobu against wasting even bad cigar. This why Jobu not like Bill Clinton. Is good idea to slide cigar into lips for nice enjoyment. But Monica and Bill slip cigar into wrong lips. What shame and waste of good smoke!

Take Jobu for Ride

Jobu been busy. Got new bike. Been riding, cruise for babes. Except tricycle only help Jobu find wrong kind of babes. Must be at least 18 to ride Jobu.

Kerry Out Order

Indians had 3 run lead. Wood came in and game went to shit. BLEW THREE RUN LEAD IN NINTH!!! Kerry Wood is cunt, and is going on SHIT LIST.

Jobu need more blood pressure medicine or Jobu pop a fuckin' vein in head.

Jobu Have Plan

Indians so shitty that Jobu think is good time to ask government for bailout money. Buy more hats for bats. Or more drinks to drown sorrows.

Cleveland Clowns

Jobu has watched almost all Indians games this year. And Jobu get excited when Indians start winning streak (i.e., win one game before lose next hunnerd). But Indians have system where bats hot, pitchers cold. If pitchers hot, bats cold. Jobu already big fan of hats for bats. Might be time for hats pitchers, too.

If game last just five innings, Indians would be near undefeated. Always blow it in late innings. Jobu not understand why. Especially to Canadians.

Is time for Cliff Lee to come off Shit List. And time to add Whole Fuckin Team instead. Canadians, you stay put because.... well... yer Canadian.

B-U-T-full

Jobu watch whole game. Have to shit since 6th inning. Indians able to squeeze out win. Now Jobu off to squeeze out little victory of his own.

The $62,000 Video

Man went to Mexico and downloaded WALLE for some kid. Used cell phone network and was charged $62,000. Jobu not have cell phone and not understand technical shit. Not sure how he download whole movie over phone. Or why he download WALLE. Or why he even GO to Mexico in first place.

Photo of WALLE giving man the finger and saying: "Fuck You"
"Where WALLE's money at, bitch?"

Why not download good movie instead?



At least Indians win in movie.