Grab Booze. Start Praying.

Time to grab bottle of rum. Spring training start soon. Then 2010 season. Shit. Time to start pray. Jobu need refill...

Indians Suck

Indians not do so good lately. Hardly ever. US economy still shitty. Jobu looking at new career options. So far, favorite idea is porn. Yes, Jobu start porn career:

"Jobu's Bunts for Cunts"

If you hot babe and want to swing Jobu's bat, leave comment. Jobu always up for a good inner-view of potential hot woman.

No Waste Cigars!

Jobu love good cigar. But Jobu against wasting good cigar. Shit, Jobu against wasting even bad cigar. This why Jobu not like Bill Clinton. Is good idea to slide cigar into lips for nice enjoyment. But Monica and Bill slip cigar into wrong lips. What shame and waste of good smoke!

Take Jobu for Ride

Jobu been busy. Got new bike. Been riding, cruise for babes. Except tricycle only help Jobu find wrong kind of babes. Must be at least 18 to ride Jobu.

Kerry Out Order

Indians had 3 run lead. Wood came in and game went to shit. BLEW THREE RUN LEAD IN NINTH!!! Kerry Wood is cunt, and is going on SHIT LIST.

Jobu need more blood pressure medicine or Jobu pop a fuckin' vein in head.

Jobu Have Plan

Indians so shitty that Jobu think is good time to ask government for bailout money. Buy more hats for bats. Or more drinks to drown sorrows.

Cleveland Clowns

Jobu has watched almost all Indians games this year. And Jobu get excited when Indians start winning streak (i.e., win one game before lose next hunnerd). But Indians have system where bats hot, pitchers cold. If pitchers hot, bats cold. Jobu already big fan of hats for bats. Might be time for hats pitchers, too.

If game last just five innings, Indians would be near undefeated. Always blow it in late innings. Jobu not understand why. Especially to Canadians.

Is time for Cliff Lee to come off Shit List. And time to add Whole Fuckin Team instead. Canadians, you stay put because.... well... yer Canadian.